I am an idiot. Plain and simple. I have a very bad habit of jumping to conclusions and making poor first impressions. I admit that. I also have a bad habit of assuming that those in my real life are unaware of my online life. Tonight I got that slapped back in my face. Again, I am an idiot. And now I need to make up for it. I am at a complete loss as to how. So this is where I start, because it is 9pm, and walking across the street and knocking on their door when they have little ones they might be trying to put to sleep is not ok to me. So here I go,
Dear J, M, J, and A,
I am truly sorry. I don’t think sometimes, and I am sorry for the things I said. My blog and twitter are how I vent. I had noticed a change in how you all were not talking to me, or my boys, and had wondered if you had read my blog. So I removed the post. It was a rash post, before giving a true chance at our boys being friends and I regret it. J is a great kid and my boys enjoy playing with him. A is a wonderful little girl who Aiden adores. And I fear that my words may have ruined what could have been great friendships. One more time, I am an idiot.
Today I couldn’t figure out what was going on, it seemed like I was getting the cold shoulder so I vented to the one place I didn’t think I could hurt feelings. The people who only know me online. Mistake again. I avoid confrontation. I prefer to vent to people who I can’t see. I am a bit of a coward that way. Again, idiot.
I wish I knew what I could do to make it up to you. Maybe you could let me know. Maybe this public apology is a start….I hope it doesn’t make things worse.
Please know that I am ashamed of this and hope that maybe we can work this out.