Thursday, November 12, 2009

Whining…..It Doesn’t change Anything!


I absolutely HATE whining.  It is really one of the biggest button pushers for me. It can send me into parenting “fit” in seconds flat….it wears on my nerves.  You get what I mean!

Jakob is the King of whiners…..he should have a crown! Seriously.  Those of you who have spent time with him and/or heard stories about him know what I am talking about.  He whines about anything and sometimes everything.  And the one thing that I continuously tell him is this…..”whining doesn’t change anything!”  Whining will not make me suddenly say “Yes” to eating candy with breakfast.  Whining will not make me agree to watching more TV after I have told you that was it.  Whining will not make me clean up your mess for you.  It doesn’t change anything!  It makes it WORSE!  It makes me want to pull out my hair and rock in a corner!  

I don’t understand where whining comes from, is it genetic?  Is there a switch that is flipped when children hit a certain age that programs them to whine?  Is there some older child that pulls yours aside at the playground and teaches them the technique?  I certainly didn’t teach him.  And now I am worried that he is whispering in Aiden’s ear about whining. 

Whining is hopefully a habit that he will soon outgrow, and I know I am probably dreaming, but I hope everyday to get through it without just one whining session.

But on to me……and my attempt to get through a year without Jason and without whining.  I hear from people how brave I am going through this and how tough it must be, and it makes me think.  Should I be complaining more?  Will that change anything?  No…as I said before….whining doesn’t change anything.  It goes for adults too. I am not only being strong for me, I am trying to be strong for my husband, for my boys.  It’s important to keep it in perspective. It’s not forever, the happier we are going through it - the easier it will be.  Now don’t get me wrong….I miss Jason every day and would be super happy if they called me and told me he was coming home tomorrow, but that probably wont happen so I wont sit around holding my breath, whining about the situation.  As my friend, Susan, use to tell me….I will “pull on my big girl panties and drive on!”

And that is my opinion on whining….for everyone.

Take Care,
Love Big, Bake Often 

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