Thursday, April 28, 2011

Thoughtful Thursday

It’s not them, it’s me…

I realized this morning that the escalation in naughty behaviour by my precious little boys isn’t actually so, and that the problem has been with the way that I have been reacting to said behaviour.  I have lost my Zen Mama Groove.  I am usually a much more mellow, easy going Mama.  Not letting the small things get to me.  Something changed.  Since the move here I have been saying that they boys behaviour has deteriorated to the point of disaster, and that I am at my wits end.  But maybe it is me.  Have I just given up trying?  Have I just lost the ability to handle them?  To have fun with them and enjoy their craziness and go with the flow?  I think so.  And this makes me sad. 

I need to lighten up.  Find my place again.  I have started taking the steps to get back into the groove that I enjoy.  Playing with my boys, baking, creating, getting involved in volunteering, learning.  Do what makes me happy.  Tired of worrying what people think or perceive as reality and get back to what really matters.  My boys.  All three of them.  Be kinder.  Talk sweeter. And stop being so hard on myself. 

1 comment:

The Vanilla Bean Baker said...

I would say that you are headed in the right direction...most importantly, to stop being so hard on yourself. Life hasn't been easy for you or your family of late and there's been a lot of transitions that everyone has to get used to at their own pace. Not worrying what people think is a tough one to master but it is quite liberating once you do. Good luck with it all :)